Eph 5:20-31 Submission and Sacrifice (Wedding Sermon)
We have just read a Biblical passage on husband and wife. It teaches us that the wife is to submit to her husband, and the husband to love his wife through sacrifice. Frankly, I find it’s a challenge to me to preach these teachings, mainly because of nowadays trend of egalitarianism. The basic idea against the teachings is, since man and woman are equal, then why should the wife submit to her husband? Man and woman should live in a relationship with equal rights and responsibilities. Well, while we don’t have time to discuss much about these different views, I like to point out that, the attack on the teachings contains so many misunderstandings. So today let us elaborate on what it means by submission and sacrifice in order to clarify some of the misunderstandings. And I do hope that our effort is not just good for our new couple, but also good for both Christians and friends in this congregation.
First of all, when a man submits to somebody, it does not mean that he is a slave. Similarly, when a wife submits to her husband, it doesn’t mean that she is a slave to her husband. Let’s read <5:21-22> again. We have to consider these two verses together in order to understand what it means by submission. In the first one, V.21, St. Paul teaches about the mutual submission in a Christian community; and the second one in V.22 is more specific to marital relationship, a special relationship in the community. Then, what it means by submission to someone? Am I a slave to my fellow Christian friends when I submit to them? Obviously not. Here in V.21 the Bible has given us a clear reason for submission: “out of reverence for Christ”. What it means is that we submit, firstly, for the sake of honouring Christ as our Lord and God, and secondly as a response to Christ’s love to us. In other words, when I serve, and honour my fellow Christians, it is because I am trying to honour Christ as the head of all of us, and also because the love of Christ compels me to do so. And most importantly, when I choose to put off my ego and arrogance and put on the humility of Christ in order to serve my fellow Christians, I am a free man, not a slave, because I am exercising my free will to honour Christ and to love. This teaching of submission is no way a moral obligation, but rather it reminds us to response to Christ. And in the same way, when the wife submits to her husband “as to the Lord”, the wife is also exercising her free will to love her husband in Christ. She is not a slave of her husband, but a subject of love, a godly being who freely responses to Christ’s calling by putting off her self-centredness. In fact no matter man or woman, we are all free in Christ. He has redeemed us through His blood on the cross and set us free that we can love each other freely. And we can do that only when Christ is at the centre of our relationship.
While submission is an expression of love, sacrifice is also another expression. Let us first look at V.28. Here the husband is told to love his wife “as his own body”. This verse echoes the wordings of Adam, the first man in the world, when he said to Eve: “you are now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”. So romantic, isn’t it. Then, how to make it happen? How to love the wife as his own body? Here Bible uses an analogy, in V. 25, “love your wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Yes, just like Christ, the husband sacrifices in his own will; sacrifices freely his time, his energy, his habit, and even his life, and sacrifices with Jesus Christ as his example. Jesus Christ loves us so much that he has sacrificed his life for us on the cross. In the same way, the husband is to ask to sacrifice for the sake of love.
So far we have seen that both submission and sacrifice are the expressions of the Christian love. We exercise submission and sacrifice as a response to Christ. And we are using our free will to do it; we are not slave to anybody but Christ. So, let me read out two verses again as the conclusion; (V.22), “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” And V.25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
First of all, when a man submits to somebody, it does not mean that he is a slave. Similarly, when a wife submits to her husband, it doesn’t mean that she is a slave to her husband. Let’s read <5:21-22> again. We have to consider these two verses together in order to understand what it means by submission. In the first one, V.21, St. Paul teaches about the mutual submission in a Christian community; and the second one in V.22 is more specific to marital relationship, a special relationship in the community. Then, what it means by submission to someone? Am I a slave to my fellow Christian friends when I submit to them? Obviously not. Here in V.21 the Bible has given us a clear reason for submission: “out of reverence for Christ”. What it means is that we submit, firstly, for the sake of honouring Christ as our Lord and God, and secondly as a response to Christ’s love to us. In other words, when I serve, and honour my fellow Christians, it is because I am trying to honour Christ as the head of all of us, and also because the love of Christ compels me to do so. And most importantly, when I choose to put off my ego and arrogance and put on the humility of Christ in order to serve my fellow Christians, I am a free man, not a slave, because I am exercising my free will to honour Christ and to love. This teaching of submission is no way a moral obligation, but rather it reminds us to response to Christ. And in the same way, when the wife submits to her husband “as to the Lord”, the wife is also exercising her free will to love her husband in Christ. She is not a slave of her husband, but a subject of love, a godly being who freely responses to Christ’s calling by putting off her self-centredness. In fact no matter man or woman, we are all free in Christ. He has redeemed us through His blood on the cross and set us free that we can love each other freely. And we can do that only when Christ is at the centre of our relationship.
While submission is an expression of love, sacrifice is also another expression. Let us first look at V.28. Here the husband is told to love his wife “as his own body”. This verse echoes the wordings of Adam, the first man in the world, when he said to Eve: “you are now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”. So romantic, isn’t it. Then, how to make it happen? How to love the wife as his own body? Here Bible uses an analogy, in V. 25, “love your wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Yes, just like Christ, the husband sacrifices in his own will; sacrifices freely his time, his energy, his habit, and even his life, and sacrifices with Jesus Christ as his example. Jesus Christ loves us so much that he has sacrificed his life for us on the cross. In the same way, the husband is to ask to sacrifice for the sake of love.
So far we have seen that both submission and sacrifice are the expressions of the Christian love. We exercise submission and sacrifice as a response to Christ. And we are using our free will to do it; we are not slave to anybody but Christ. So, let me read out two verses again as the conclusion; (V.22), “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” And V.25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
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